Oh, the joys of the holidays. There are three things I prefer not to discuss at the dinner table: Religion, politics, and my dating life. I’ve come to terms that I am usually the single one, who is dating, at the table. When I was younger it didn’t bother me much. At this point in my life, I don’t particularly enjoy it anymore. It is what it is, and I work hard to find peace and more importantly the humor in it all. I love this time of the year, and that will never change. To say that I’m elated that I’m solo as the holidays approach is a bold face lie. It would be nice to share it with someone special. My sense of humor does come in handy this time of year. My good friend Jodi, used to say, “if you can’t laugh with your donkeys, who can you laugh with?” I think if I didn’t have the ability to laugh and cry at what life throws at me, I might just go insane. But thankfully my sarcasm and my ability to laugh at myself has carried me this far.
Here are seven, little tips that may help some of you singles cope with “singledom” during the holidays.
1. Avoidance is sometimes a necessity:
Hide from or avoid family who ask those dreaded questions or provide commentary such as: “Why are you still single? Or, “Oh, that’s too bad dear.” Or, my favorite of all time, “You better hurry up; time is ticking.” Is it? Really? I had no idea. In my world, time stands still because I will it so.
2. Occupy your time:
Get that booty in the gym and work it. Run, spin, Zumba, kick box… Anything that helps get all that pinned up, being single frustration out of your system. You know what I’m talking about. It’s building or was built, torn down and built again. And why is it so tall and aggressive this time around? Tear it down!!
3. Finding inner peace any way possible:
Meditate. Who am I kidding? Drink! I’m not a fan of eggnog otherwise I would suggest that. Lots and lots of it.
4. Survival is as simple as turning a blind eye:
Stay away from happy couples! Okay, their happiness should not affect you, and you are truly happy for them. You are. Fa la la la la lala la la. A piece of advice, turn away from those annoying car commercials. You know the ones. The one where the adoring husband buys his wife a new car with the adorning and annoying red bow on top. Avoid anything from Jared. I know he went there! We all know he went there!
5. Online trolling is not always the best answer:
‘Tis the season for a lot of desperation and loneliness. So, if you are online dating or trolling Tinder (or any other dating app), be careful out there. Protect yourself and be good to the people you meet. Don’t mess with their hearts because it will come back and bite you in the arse. Honesty is a virtue most people take for granted these days. Okay, that was not a humorous tip. I got real there for a minute. Just checking that you are all paying attention.
6. The gift that keeps on giving…
I don’t know about you, but I love giving fun, unique gifts more so than receiving them. Okay, don’t get me wrong, I like receiving too. If you don’t have a special someone to shop for just think of all the dough, you are saving. Ka-Ching. Buy yourself the gift you want. Hell, why not even wrap it; stick it under the tree and act surprised when you open it Christmas morning. It’s the little things.
7. Get your tuckus out there!
I know you would rather stay home, watching those sappy, Hallmark holiday movies in your flannels, sipping hot cocoa. Snap out of it! Call a friend or two or three. Get out of the house. Drive around and look at Christmas lights. Ladies, meet your girlfriends out for a cocktail. Go to the holiday parties, dare I say alone. Single and proud! Doll yourself up and show up! Buy those new shoes and the party dress. You never know who you might meet.
The holidays don’t have to be torture. For those that choose to be single more power to you. For those who cringe at this upcoming yuletide time, do your best to carry on, laugh, enjoy and know that you are not alone.
Happy Holidays to all my friends: the sad singles, the happy to be singles, the coupled, the uncoupled, the tortured souls, and everyone in between!
By | Gina L. Cafasso